New Release: Who Left the Cork Out of My Lunch?

Cork Cover

Are you a woman who has ever looked in the mirror and thought, “How did my mother get in my bathroom?” Have you gone through years of night sweats and seismic mood swings, leaving you with a metabolism that forces you to choose between wine and carbs (so you haven’t had a bagel in eight years)? Did you wake up one morning in someone else’s body? Then you will love this book.

If you ever made a regrettable hairstyle choice, finally conceded that thongs make you look like a Weeble in dental floss, or wished your Hubs would learn that grabbing your boobs every time you walk past him with a load of laundry is not foreplay, then you will love this book.

Who Left the Cork out of My Lunch? is chock-full of funny, informative how-to lists, hilarious advice columns, and sharp personal anecdotes that cover subjects from menopause (are we done yet?), empty nest syndrome (sob!), and grandchildren (yay!), to sex (better after fifty), marriage (he said what?), age-appropriate fashion (what does that mean?), cosmetic intervention (to Botox or not to Botox?), diet fails (#972), beauty tips from Mom (still true), and confidence (fabulous after fifty).

Laugh along with author Vikki Claflin and her amusing advice on how to let go of our youth and start rocking our middle age. Are you ready?

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Review: Neanderthal Seeks Human

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Image from Goodreads

There are three things you need to know about Janie Morris: 1) She is incapable of engaging in a conversation without volunteering TMTI (Too Much Trivial Information), especially when she is unnerved, 2) No one unnerves her more than Quinn Sullivan, and 3) She doesn’t know how to knit.

After losing her boyfriend, apartment, and job in the same day, Janie Morris can’t help wondering what new torment fate has in store. To her utter mortification, Quinn Sullivan- aka Sir McHotpants- witnesses it all then keeps turning up like a pair of shoes you lust after but can’t afford. The last thing she expects is for Quinn- the focus of her slightly, albeit harmless, stalkerish tendencies- to make her an offer she can’t refuse.

(Blurb from Goodreads)

Ah, I loved this book. It starts off with the main character, Janie, in the bathroom at her work without any toilet paper. Janie also broke up with her boyfriend the night before. She really isn’t having a good day.
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New Release: Who Stole My Spandex?

Spandex Cover

Blogger Marcia Kester Doyle tells it like it is and nothing is off limits. Who Stole My Spandex? is a witty selection of stories from Doyle’s madcap world of menopausal pitfalls, wardrobe malfunctions, and a family full of pranksters. This clever compilation includes laugh-out-loud pieces like “Queen of Klutz,” “One Size Fits None,” and “Hands off my Egg Roll!” From couples’ colonoscopies to nightmare holidays to disappearing spandex, no topic—no matter how crazy or unimaginable—is too taboo.

With a heavy dose of self-deprecating humor, and a dash of sentiment, this marvelous collection of anecdotes will resonate with anyone who’s ever felt the call of nature at exactly the wrong time.

Welcome to the nuthouse that Marcia Kester Doyle calls home.

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Author Bio

Marcia Kester Doyle is the voice behind the popular humor blog, Menopausal Mother, where she muses on the good, the bad, and the ugly side of midlife mayhem. Give her a glass of wine and a jar of Nutella, and she’ll be your best friend.

Marcia has written for The Huffington Post, Humor Outcasts, In the Powder Room, and What The Flicka. Marcia has also been featured on numerous sites such as Scary Mommy, BlogHer, The Erma Bombeck Writer’s Workshop, Midlife Boulevard, Boomeon, and BA50, among others. She is a contributing author to the following books: The Mother of All Meltdowns, Clash of the Couples, Motherhood: May Cause Drowsiness, Sunshine After the Storm, To Bliss and Back, Parenting Gag Reel, Surviving Mental Illness Through Humor,  Mom for the Holidays, and will be featured in the forthcoming anthology How Can You Laugh at a Time Like This?

Marcia is a BlogHer Voice of the Year 2014 recipient and VoiceBoks Top Hilarious Parent Blogger 2014. She was also voted as a Top 25 Blogger in the Circle of Moms Contest 2013. She is a native Floridian and married mother of four children, as well as being a grandparent to a feisty toddler.

 

You can read Marcia’s humor blog, Menopausal Mother or follow her at:

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***I am the manager for this book and I DO receive profits from each book sold.***

New Release: A Fighting Chance

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Former Marine Tyler Bradford just returned to his native Texas after a long stint overseas. As he’s driving home to see his family and meet his niece for the first time, another driver runs him off the road. When that car ends up in a pasture, Tyler’s rescue instincts kick in. He didn’t expect to find a sexy woman from Boston, and rescuing her wouldn’t be the only thing on his mind.

Tiffani was called back home to Texas to settle her deceased mother’s estate. It was the last place on earth she wanted to be. She’d put thousands of miles between her and her horrible childhood memories, and didn’t think she’d ever find herself back in the Lone Star State. A twist of fate put her in the path of Tyler Bradford and turned her life upside down. Again. Can she finally forgive herself for her troubled past, or will the stubborn walls she’s erected around her heart keep everything and everyone she’s ever cared about at arm’s length?

A Fighting Chance is the third book in the erotic romance Chances Are Series by C.D. Taylor.

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Author Bio

C.D. Taylor began writing as an item to check off her bucket list. After putting words on paper, she decided that being an author was where she needed to be. She resides on a CDAuthorPicfarm in southern Illinois with her husband, son and a plethora of animals. Taylor is a huge kid at heart. She loves playing practical jokes, challenging her son to a game of Super Mario and rarely rolls out of bed before noon. She enjoys dancing, is perpetually clumsy and has a horrible green thumb. Taylor believes that if you work hard, you must play even harder.

 

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***Disclaimer: I am the manager for this book and do receive profit for each book sold.***

 

 

New Release: The King of Average

The King of Average Cover .

James isn’t the world’s greatest kid, but he’s not the worst, either: he’s average! When he decides to become the most average kid who ever lived, James is transported to another world where he meets Mayor Culpa, a well-dressed talking Scapegoat who recruits him to become the new King of Average.

He’s joined on his quest by a professional Optimist and his grouchy companion, an equally professional Pessimist. Together, they set out on a journey of self-discovery that leads them all the way from the Sea of Doubt to Mount Impossible, the highest peak in the Unattainable Mountains. When James stumbles into a Shangri-la called Epiphany, he uncovers the secret of who he really is.

Follow James on his hilarious, adventure-packed journey to find self-worth in this heartfelt middle grade novel The King of Average by debut author Gary Schwartz.

Author Bio

Gary Schwartz began his professional career as a mime at age 13, performing up and Gary Schwartzdown the Hudson River with Pete Seeger and the great folk entertainers of the 1960s. In the 1980s he appeared in numerous film and television projects including the Oscar-winning feature film Quest for Fire. Schwartz has lent his voice to hundreds of film and TV projects and is the voice of several well-known video game characters, including Heavy Weapons Guy and Demoman in Team Fortress 2.

Schwartz has written for two children’s television series in which he co-starred: Zoobilee Zoo, where he played Bravo Fox; and the Disney Channel’s You and Me, Kid.

Schwartz studied with and became the protégé of Viola Spolin, the creator of Theater Games, the basis for improvisational theater in America. He is a passionate, dynamic improv coach and facilitator devoted to carrying on Spolin’s techniques.

The King of Average is his first novel. To learn more visit:

 

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***Disclosure: I am the book manager for this book, and I do receive profit from each book sold.***